# Hiking:  It’s Gonna Suck To Be You If……



## billski (Jun 17, 2012)

It’s Gonna Suck To Be You If…… 


You didn’t pack enough food and you’re running short.
Worse, you’re out of food and the river crossing is too dangerous to ford.
You’re carrying too much weight and should have left some of it home.
You slip off the bog bridging and find yourself knee deep in mud.
You’re injured and don’t know how to get out of the 100 Mile Wilderness.
You didn’t take the time to break in your new boots.
You come face to face with a bull moose and it’s mating season.
Poor planning on your part causes you discomfort, inconvenience or injury.
You get caught hunting or fishing without a license.
Worse yet, you make a fire at an unauthorized campsite.
It’s late summer and the water sources at Long Pond Stream, Chairback  Gap and Wadleigh Stream lean-tos are dried up and you’re out of water.
You get giardia because you didn’t treat your water.
It’s 2am and you have the “Hershey squirts” and can’t find your flashlight or toilet paper.
Your knees buckle and your lungs are about to burst because your pack weight exceeds your body weight.
You fail to loosen your shoulder straps and unbuckle your waist belt before fording any water crossing.
You don’t have any dry clothes to change into at days end.
You think that since it’s July or August, you don’t need to carry cold weather gear.
You fail to treat the seams of your tent with sealant.
Your gear gets wet because you forgot to put everything into plastic bags.
It rains for days on end and there is still more rain in the forecast.
You’re hiking during black fly, deerfly or mosquito season.
You arrive at a shelter and it’s pouring rain and the shelter is full.
The campsite you plan to stay at is occupied by a camp or scout group.
You didn’t get in shape before the hike and now you wish you had.
You fail to make reservations at Baxter State Park and find out there is no place for you to stay.
Your dog is wet, just rolled in something and makes himself comfortable on somebody else’s sleeping bag.
You forgot to bring your bug dope or headnet


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## Gnarcissaro (Jun 19, 2012)

-You're hiking behind your buddy who had Taco Bell last night. 
-You've been lucky not hanging your food or using a bear canister until NOW.
-Mice raid your food/down bag/TP.
-You're unprepared without a flashlight/headlamp and it gets dark.
-You take the wrong trail down and end up miles from your vehicle. 
-You arrive at the summit only to find someone loudly using his/her cellphone. :uzi:
-You go to blowup your mattress pad to find it has a hole in it.
-You eat something your body doesn't agree with and have the shits all day.

The list goes on...


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## mattm59 (Jul 2, 2012)

your friend arrives in the dark with a fancy press type coffee maker, and you decide on a couple cups before bed. It's 20 degrees out, and you're nice and toasty in your bag....and it's 1 a.m...1:12 a.m....1:30 a.m. ....1:44 a.m.......


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## gottabelight (Feb 13, 2013)

^haha no coffee after 1pm for me! 
-your dog takes a dump / piss in or on the tent / sleeping bag...


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## bigbog (May 9, 2013)

You aren't into packing an appropriate map...to at least get your directions for where help is.


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